This weekend has been an interesting one so far, one that has made me realize that there are some things that I am quite thankful we do not have to experience in the states. On Saturday I had the privelege of helping to decorate and attend an introduction here at New Hope. The purpose of an introduction is to publicly announce two individuals to be wed as well as to introduce the bride's family to the groom's family. It is a very big deal over here as the couple is not allowed to be seen alone together before the introduction. Actually, the entire dating/relationship system is very different from ours. It starts with the guy, who, when he is interested in a girl, goes to his spiritual advisor to tell them about his interest and to ask for advice. If the spiritual advisor feels that it is a good match and that the man is ready for a serious relationship he approaches the woman's spiritual advisor and asks if the woman is ready for a relationship. The woman's advisor then, if he or she feels the woman is ready, asks the woman if she would be interested in having a relationship with the man. If she agrees to it, then they start meeting, but always with others around, as they are not allowed to be alone together. This goes on for a few months until they agree upon marriage, after which, an introduction is held. They are then allowed to date as we have it in the states, until they are married. It's a process that I found to be very structured, very detailed, and very crazy. However, it seems that for the couples that have gone through this process they are extremely close and happy in their marriages.
Not all Ugandans participate in this process, as can be seen by the children who have been abandoned here at New Hope. Many of the kids have a parent who is still alive, but is unable to care for them as they are not married and cannot afford to raise a child. It is actually something that is preached a lot here in the schools as it is a problem in the culture here that men leave women who are pregnant with their children without any financial support.
But, back to the introduction, the whole affair is an extremely big deal and is actually more of a celebration than the actual wedding. The bride has two or three outfits during the ceremony and matching outfits for her bridesmaids. All the bride and groom's immediate families as well as aunts, uncles, cousins and so on come to meet each other while friends look on from the sides. Everything has a tradition, down to what is said, what songs are sang, where the families sit and how they are served, it was quite entertaining to watch. And the gowns of both the introduction party and the guests were beautiful, something I think my sisters would quite enjoy to see. The colors that they use in their clothing here is so vibrant, it makes everything that much more beautiful. The men, on the other hand, wore what they call a "man dress" which is like an extremely long collared shirt that extends to the ankles, slacks underneath, and a suit coat over that. In 90 degree whether, they had to be dying under all that clothing. I'll have to post some pictures when I get a chance.
The ceremony lasted for about four hours with lunch/dinner served after that. Since I started at 7 with decorating and then gone to the ceremony at 11 and was still under the awful throws of jetlag, I actually slept through the middle hour and a half, but was back in time to see the end of the ceremony and eat the food. Good timing, huh? By the time all the guests left and we had finished putting everything away it was close to 7 in the evening, that's 12 hours of prep and everything for those who hosted, not to mention all the cooking they did the night before, craziness.
Overall though, it was fun to watch it all and I'm thankful I get to be here amongst the people and the culture and get a small glimpse as to how they live their lives on the other side of the world.
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